I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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