Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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