you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
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Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
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I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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