How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
