Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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