me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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