And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
