i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
