Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
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I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
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Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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