I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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