His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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