Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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