well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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