I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize