I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
There's always time for handjobs
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
