then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Two words: blizzard sex
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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