found the other keg... it's in the tree
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize