so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize