I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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