I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
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