Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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