Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
