i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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