Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Randomize