That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
