she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He shit in the fireplace
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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