I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
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