Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
