called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Randomize
