You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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