craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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