She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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