You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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