he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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