it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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