And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize