She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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