He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
It's never too late to be topless.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
