Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
