your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
