Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
