haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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