Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
