normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
