Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize