if you like me you must not know who I am
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
