Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
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