So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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