i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
