So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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