found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
